Make A Wish, At A Price

Granted, they're gone... But now you're craving their fries and can't have them...




I wish to have the ability to disappear and reappear at will with no chance of getting stuck either way...

Granted, but you can only do it once a year.

I wish there was a way to make a Street Fighter/Mortal Kombat crossover game.

Granted, but it's only released in Japan and is incompatible with any North American consoles.

I wish for a decent tuna melt with a side of onion rings and a nice cold Sprite to drink, plus strawberry cheesecake for dessert. And have it all be good, nothing wrong with it, won't harm me in any way, and it's not a dream.

« Last edited by CrypticWizard on Dec 13th 2014 »

Granted, but you lose your appetite the same day.

I wish for a cure for cancer.

Granted, but it's only made available to the very rich.

I wish for a cure for ALL diseases that is available to everyone.

« Last edited by CrypticWizard on Dec 10th 2014 »

Actually there is a cure for cancer but it's not available to anyone but the 1% because charging people for chemotherapy nets more profits.

I wish for a free gun for every American.

« Last edited by KingofCorn on Dec 10th 2014 »

Granted, but everyone will now die.

I wish there weren't racists in the world.

Granted so now they are in heaven. Thanks a lot.

I wish for a free pistol for every American.

Granted, but then you get gunned down by some idiot with a free pistol.

I wish there was a sure way to keep idiots from getting guns.

Granted but then liberals will run out of things to complain about.


I wish idiots would stop blaming machines.

Granted, instead they blame you.

I wish I had a metallic blue 3DS.

Granted, but the 3DS fails to work.

I wish for both versions of Super Smash Bros 4.

Granted, but both versions fail to work.

I wish I had a metallic blue 3DS that works.

« Last edited by CrypticWizard on Dec 13th 2014 »

Granted, but you lose both your hands from amputations.

I wish for good luck.

Granted, but the good luck comes to me in the form of my hands not getting amputated. Your good luck comes in the form of me letting you live for trying to amputate them in the first place.

I wish for myself, my friends, my relatives, and my three cats to live long, long lives.

Granted, but you all live the majority of your lives on life support.

I wish more people donated their organs when they're dying.

Granted, but the ones who do have diseased organs so they aren't suitable for transplants.

I wish people's organs didn't deteriorate over time.

Granted, they deteriorate instantly.

I wish another colour was discovered.

Granted, but it turns out to be yet another shade of brown which isn't a true colour anyway.

I wish we could explore Mars.

Granted, you get to explore it, but you suffocate because there is no oxygen.

I wish I could scuba dive.