funny peaple belong here

hey its mario 54 this is gona be a copotion im the judge who ever get me to laugh hard wins its gona be fun ok here is the peaple who advance to second round: repner is in first u advance cantor u in second u avance in third we have kamehameha555 u advance and finallyin fourth we have have pete the gta genius the ollowin peaple say more jokes and ill tally up the scores thank you o and fifth we have gold berg that u for partisipating the final 5 say jokes and winner goes on my team

« Last edited by mario54 on Nov 26th 2006 »

come on any 1 winner gets to be on my team

dont double post!

ok im sorry is that ook

yeah, just don't do it again.

ok so u wana say a joke

Is it supossed to be like a joke or someting that really happened.

joke dude just joke

i think ive posted this one on SC before, but anyways:

A man is driving along the motorway with his wife in the passenger seat. During the drive, the wife gets an idea. She starts taking off her clothing piece by piece and tossing them out the window.

The guy is shocked but aroused. She gets her shoes, socks, etc. and chucks them out. Finally, she whips her underwear off and throws it all out onto the motorway. The guy is laughing and leering at her. He looses control of the car in the process and crashes into a barrier at the side.

Unfortunately, the air-bag doesn't go off on his side, and he finds himself wedged in under the steering wheel. "Help, go get help......aggghhhh, I'm stuck", he shouts.

"But I have no clothes on. What'll I do ?", she screams.

"Here", he says wiggling his foot, "Take my shoe and put it over your crotch. It'll have to do, love. Quick, hurry!"

She takes the shoe off his foot and places it over her crotch and gets out of the car, limping and shouting for help. After a few hundred yards of yelling and running a trucker notices this naked hysterical woman holding a shoe over her crotch, and pulls over.

"What's seems to be the trouble?", he asks.

"Help me", she screams, "My husband is stuck".

"If he's stuck up that far I'm afraid I can't help you."

lol lol ill give u a 8 perfect get more peaple to come

I know how to make you laugh...

Look at the weblink in my sig.

naaa not that funny ill give it a 3

repner if u want bonus points say a good joke u get bounus if there 5 or up in the extra bonus joke

You must have didnt see the end.

Welp,I tried.

yea u wana scare me i no

A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband, 'Please be gentle; I'm still a virgin.

' 'What?' said the puzzled groom. 'How can that be if you've been married ten times?'

'Well, Husband #1 was a Sales Representative; he kept telling me how great it was going to be.

Husband #2 was in Software Services; he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me.

Husband #3 was from Field Services; he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.

Husband #4 was in Telemarketing; even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.

Husband #5 was an Engineer; he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.

Husband #6 was from Finance and Administration; he thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.

Husband #7 was in Marketing; although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it.

Husband #8 was a psychiatrist; all he ever did was talk about it.

Husband #9 was a gynecologist; all he did was look at it.

Husband#10 was a stamp collector; all he ever did was.... God! I miss him!!!

But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!'

'Good,' said the lawyer, 'but, why?'

'Duh! You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm gonna get screwed!'

lol dude perfect il give u a 6 ur bnus is from 8 to 17 ill give u one more bounus shot get more peaple to come here to

dude u gona do the extra extra bonus joke?

I came up with this joke.

Ok well a boy named Phil was helping his mom clean and she said "Damn!". Phil said "whats wronge?" "I can't find my black sponge" she replies. So later that night Phil walks in the bathroom on his mom accidentally and pointed at her crotch and asked Whats that? She said my black sponge. Well the next day Phil was walking home and saw something unusual in someones house then rushed to his mom. "Mom! MOM!" replied Phil. She said What? He said I found your sponge. Where? asked Mom. At Mrs. Dukes house and daddy's washing his face in it.


Another I thought of at school:

A man was in a long line at Target. As he got to the register
he realized he had forgotten to get condoms, so he asked the
checkout girl if she could have some brought up to the register.

She asked, "What size condoms?"

The customer replied that he didn't know.

She asked him to drop his pants. He did.
She reached over the counter, grabbed hold of him and called over
the intercom, "One box of large condoms, Register 5."

The next man in line thought this was interesting, and like most
of us, was up for a cheap thrill. When he got up to the register, he
told the checker that he too had forgotten to get condoms, and asked
if she could have some brought to the register for him.

She asked him what size, and he stated that he didn't know. She
asked him to drop his pants. He did.

She gave him a quick feel, picked up the intercom and said, "One
box of medium-sized condoms, Register 5."

A few customers back was this teenage boy. He thought what he had
seen was way too cool. He had never had any type of sexual contact
with a live female, so he thought this was his chance. When he got
to the register he told the checker he needed some condoms.

She asked him what size and he said he didn't know. She asked him
to drop his pants and he did. She reached over the counter, gave him
a quick squeeze, then picked up the intercom and said...

"Cleanup, Register 5"

a man walks into a bar each day and orders exactly three drinks.
After this continues for about a week the bartender asks the man, "Why do you always have three drinks?" the man replys "well, one is for me, the other two are to remember my two friends."
The bartender thinks this is a fair explanation and carrys on with his job.
The next day the man walks into the bar and only orders two drinks. Shocked, the bartender asks "What happened? Did one of your friends die?"
The man replys, "no, they're both fine. I quit drinking"

Another man walks into a bar... ouch!