As king of the independent republican monarchy of My Lawn I would purchase the Insecticide 3, capable of running at 60 fps (flies per second) without trouble.
You, however, are not a My Lawn citizen. You are an American, which leads me to recommend the Exbox Juan. Video games are trivial to me as the leader of My Lawn so I do not know of the details, but this machine is produced in your country and it would be unpatriotic to buy another. Purchasing a Trainstation 4 would be an act of treachery, for your precious dollars would further support the foreign menace. Do you want the Japanese to take over America? Do I want them to invade My Lawn? Of course I do not. For this reason I would never buy anything produced by a strange country lacking in morals.
- "God Bless Lawn!"