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testuser Posted: 14:22 Feb11 2016 Post ID: 3401759
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and then there will be cake.
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Alright, so my favourite thing about being a dad is.. making my kids cry.. with laughter.. ok just groan at my jokes.

But I need more.. so i'll share some here and hopefully you can help me out with some more. This is for clean jokes though.

So one of my first (oldest) favourite bad jokes is:

When is a door not a door?
Spoiler:
click to reveal


And one that I heard recently:

What would it be if a cat won a dog show?
Spoiler:
click to reveal


Oh my sides...

Anyway. ill post some more when I remember them. Please share if you've got any. Remember, dad jokes.. (so bad they're .. no they're just bad)


« Last edited by testuser on Jul 21st 2017 »
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Matt77 Posted: 18:31 Feb11 2016 Post ID: 3401771
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Please, I don't need any more of these in my life *cries*

ViolinViolinViolin
~ Sometimes people change, but sometimes you just open your eyes & realise who they truly are ~

Warrior13 said:I realized that Matt is the Chosen One of SC.

Credits to KingofCorn for the awesome avatar!
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danielroxheaps Posted: 18:56 Feb11 2016 Post ID: 3401775
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Whenever my brother says that "I'm Hungry" or "I'm thirsty" or something along those lines, my dad responds with "Hello hungry" or "I thought your name was [Insert Name Here]"


Steam: http://steamcommunity.com/i...roxheaps
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To find me on any other website just look for the user "danielroxheaps"

testuser said:Aww.. if I knew I was going to get sig'ed I would have been ruder
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steelersrock01 Posted: 23:32 Feb11 2016 Post ID: 3401785
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Hey hungry, I'm dad


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Sanzano Posted: 01:32 Feb12 2016 Post ID: 3401789
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Here's one:

'I used to have a job at a calendar factory but I got the sack because I took a couple of days off.'
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Matt77 Posted: 01:44 Feb12 2016 Post ID: 3401790
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ViolinViolinViolin
~ Sometimes people change, but sometimes you just open your eyes & realise who they truly are ~

Warrior13 said:I realized that Matt is the Chosen One of SC.

Credits to KingofCorn for the awesome avatar!
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testuser Posted: 02:58 Feb12 2016 Post ID: 3401795
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and then there will be cake.
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steelersrock01 said:Hey hungry, I'm dad

Ah that is a classic. Have to use it sparingly though.

Sanzano said:'I used to have a job at a calendar factory but I got the sack because I took a couple of days off.'

Yes, I love the one liners

I wasn't going to get a brain transplant, but then I changed my mind.

What do you call a cheese that's not yours?
Spoiler:
click to reveal


What cheese do you give to a shy bear?
Spoiler:
click to reveal


« Last edited by testuser on Feb 12th 2016 »
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KingofCorn Posted: 02:13 Feb13 2016 Post ID: 3401842
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Avoid the Noid.
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Guards stopped me for being a Redguard out after dark. This town is so Whiterun.
Make America Great Again
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Craizen Posted: 05:05 Feb13 2016 Post ID: 3401847
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I have to resist punching someone when I hear the "Hi Hungry" one
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testuser Posted: 07:47 Feb13 2016 Post ID: 3401850
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Erm Corn dude.. that one is a bit over my head.

Sorry you feel that way Craizen.. personally I can't stand insects puns,
....they really bug me.
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Matt77 Posted: 08:16 Feb13 2016 Post ID: 3401854
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*cringe*
*cry*
*run*
*scream*
*cower in corner*

ViolinViolinViolin
~ Sometimes people change, but sometimes you just open your eyes & realise who they truly are ~

Warrior13 said:I realized that Matt is the Chosen One of SC.

Credits to KingofCorn for the awesome avatar!
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balthiersbit Posted: 15:24 Feb13 2016 Post ID: 3401864
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My father doesnt do puns.

He does the fake nose blowing on fancy napkins.
Makes a teapot burp.
Does really bad dancing in music stores.
Pretends to surf if it one of those escalators that dont have steps.
And many many more.

Thanx to Craizen for the sig, love ya babe, Hubby for the avi.
testuser said:Even the 's' can't save you from Dino slapping


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testuser Posted: 03:22 Feb14 2016 Post ID: 3401921
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and then there will be cake.
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Your father is an inspiration.

What do you call an alligator in a vest?
Spoiler:
click to reveal
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balthiersbit Posted: 13:03 Feb14 2016 Post ID: 3401943
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He's a terror! Lol

Thanx to Craizen for the sig, love ya babe, Hubby for the avi.
testuser said:Even the 's' can't save you from Dino slapping


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danielroxheaps Posted: 16:13 Feb14 2016 Post ID: 3401951
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Matt, let's run far, far away from here...


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To find me on any other website just look for the user "danielroxheaps"

testuser said:Aww.. if I knew I was going to get sig'ed I would have been ruder
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Matt77 Posted: 17:41 Feb14 2016 Post ID: 3401971
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What do you call an alligator in a vest?
Spoiler:
An Investigator

NOOOOO!!!

ViolinViolinViolin
~ Sometimes people change, but sometimes you just open your eyes & realise who they truly are ~

Warrior13 said:I realized that Matt is the Chosen One of SC.

Credits to KingofCorn for the awesome avatar!
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danielroxheaps Posted: 18:38 Feb14 2016 Post ID: 3401972
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Come on Matt *pulls on arm* let's get out of here before it explodes


P.S: How do I add an image?


Steam: http://steamcommunity.com/i...roxheaps
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To find me on any other website just look for the user "danielroxheaps"

testuser said:Aww.. if I knew I was going to get sig'ed I would have been ruder
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Matt77 Posted: 01:36 Feb15 2016 Post ID: 3402005
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1. Find the image on google.
2. Click 'View Image'.
3. Copy & paste the image URL into the text box.
4. Highlight the text with the URL and click 'Add Pic'.
5. If you wish, you can place [center] & [/cent.er] at the beginning and end of the URL to make it centered.
6. Run away from this thread ASAP.

ViolinViolinViolin
~ Sometimes people change, but sometimes you just open your eyes & realise who they truly are ~

Warrior13 said:I realized that Matt is the Chosen One of SC.

Credits to KingofCorn for the awesome avatar!
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testuser Posted: 03:17 Feb15 2016 Post ID: 3402012
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and then there will be cake.
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Come on guys don't go. Its not that bad.
Nikki, I know what you mean about embarrassing dads. My kids asked me to stop singing oasis songs in public.
I said maybe....

No but seriously I can be embarrassing. When my wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo I had to put my foot down.
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danielroxheaps Posted: 16:44 Feb15 2016 Post ID: 3402061
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I should show my dad this forum...

My uncle makes more and better dad jokes than my Dad, but then again my uncle buys Chillis with "20th most hottest Chilli in the world" or something like that.

Dad jokes, they make me want to do this:

Matt77 said:*cringe*
*cry*
*run*
*scream*
*cower in corner*


Steam: http://steamcommunity.com/i...roxheaps
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/use...mation=1
To find me on any other website just look for the user "danielroxheaps"

testuser said:Aww.. if I knew I was going to get sig'ed I would have been ruder
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