funny peaple belong here

lol, quick and simple, but i like it

an englishman a scottsman and an irishman apply for the army and pass all the tests with flying colours.
the trainer then says: we can only accept one of you so we have prepared one more test, you must go into this room and shoot your wife with this gun.
so the englishman says: im sorry, i just cant do it. so he goes home
then the scottsman says: its too hard, ill have to pass. and goes home too
then the irishman says: ok, give me the gun then
the trainer replys: alright then, knock when your done

the irishman goes into the room and after ten seconds a gunshot goes off. but no knock. for another ten minutes all anyone can hear outside is shouting, still no knock. finally the shouting stops and the irishman knocks on the door

the irishman emerges with scratches and cuts all over his face. the trainer says: well done, you passed the test, welcome to the army, but what took you so long???

so the irishman replys: some dumbass put blanks in the gun so i had to strangle her to death

and the irishman replys: some dumbass put

^Lol, that one was great!

« Last edited by X360 Gamer93 on Nov 26th 2006 »

A little boy and a little girl attended the same school and became friends.
Every day they would sit together to eat their lunch. They discovered that
they both brought chicken sandwiches every day!
This went on all through the fourth and fifth grades, until one day he
noticed that her sandwich wasn't a chicken sandwich.
He said, "Hey, how come you're not eating chicken, don't you like it anymore?"
She said "I love it but I have to stop eating it."

"Why?" he asked.
She pointed to her lap and said "Cause I'm starting to grow little feathers down there!"
"Let me see" he said.
"Okay" and she pulled up her skirt.
He looked and said, "That's right. You are! Better not eat any more chicken."
He kept eating his chicken sandwiches until one day he brought peanut butter.
He said to the little girl, "I have to stop eating chicken sandwiches, I'm starting to get feathers down there too!"



She asked if she could look, so he pulled down his pants for her.
She said "Oh, my God, it's too late for you! You've already got the neck and the gizzards!!!

omg thats funny crap righ thtere

How about a dumb blonde joke( no offense blondes)

A blonde was sitting in front of a store crying. When a man came out of the store and saw her crying, he asked her what was wrong. She said her mother just died. The man sympatheticly tried to calm her down. Then the blonde's Cell rings and her it is her Sister. She hangs up and the man asks who it was. She said it was her Sister and she said that her mom just died too!

Why'd the blonde get fired from the M&M Factory? For throwing W's away.
Got that off the internet BTW.

3 girls,A blonde, brunette, and red headed are stranded in the woods and they said every girl for them self. Well the red head and brunette girl go and get food. Blonde says how'd you get that. Followed the tracks and killed the bear. So the bvlonde leaves then returns bloody and bruised. They say what happened?!. She said followed tracks and a train hit me.

a brunette walks into a doctor's office, and says "Doctor it hurts everywhere in my body!" and starts touching the places that hurt. The doctor says "Were you at one point a blond?" She says, "Yeah why?" he says "Your finger is broken."

A brunette, blond, and red head drop dead. They are allowed to go to heaven, on one condition. There were 100 steps, and every step there will be a joke. if they laugh, they dont go to heaven. The Brunette laughs at the 32nd step, and the red head laughs at the 65th step. on the 100th step, the blonde laughs. The guy says "I didnt even tell the joke yet!" she says "I know, I just got the first one!"

« Last edited by Town Idiot25 on Nov 26th 2006 »

A blond was in a store and she says" Wow look a chicken" And a guy says" ya and that chicken's up my butt so can you pleaz help" so she gets the chicken out and say's "yum this will make a great appetizer. she goes home and eats it and she says" hey this doesn't taste like chicken...... IT TASTES LIKE STEAK!! I want a refund. she goes back to the guy and sticks it up his butt again and says" That wasn't chicken that was steak and just then he says"yes it was you ******. She says"Oh... I didn't know" He says" duh your a blonde" and she just stares with drool hanging out of her mouth and says" Really I didn't know... derrrrrrrrr!!

On 27-Nov-2006 jackx said:

A blond was in a store and she says" Wow look a chicken" And a guy says" ya and that chicken's up my butt so can you pleaz help" so she gets the chicken out and say's "yum this will make a great appetizer. she goes home and eats it and she says" hey this doesn't taste like chicken...... IT TASTES LIKE STEAK!! I want a refund. she goes back to the guy and sticks it up his butt again and says" That wasn't chicken that was steak and just then he says"yes it was you ******. She says"Oh... I didn't know" He says" duh your a blonde" and she just stares with drool hanging out of her mouth and says" Really I didn't know... derrrrrrrrr!!

Wow. That was pretty much the stupidest thing I[i][/i]'ve heard all week. All month even.

i dont really think this is funny its just stating the obvious but ok here it is
whats the difference between salemence and agumon : one is a pokemon and the other is a digimon (get it ? neither do i!)

man all u peaple are funny but 5 of u advence chek the first post in first page and my post is really good

On 26-Nov-2006 mario54 said:

hey its mario 54 this is gona be a copotion im the judge who ever get me to laugh hard wins its gona be fun ok here is the peaple who advance to second round: repner is in first u advance cantor u in second u avance in third we have kamehameha555 u advance and finallyin fourth we have have pete the gta genius the ollowin peaple say more jokes and ill tally up the scores thank you o and fifth we have gold berg that u for partisipating the final 5 say jokes and winner goes on my team

"winner goes on your team" o_O

you are obligated by the SuperCheats rules to let anyone on your team if they ask.

On 27-Nov-2006 jackx said:

A blond was in a store and she says" Wow look a chicken" And a guy says" ya and that chicken's up my butt so can you pleaz help" so she gets the chicken out and say's "yum this will make a great appetizer. she goes home and eats it and she says" hey this doesn't taste like chicken...... IT TASTES LIKE STEAK!! I want a refund. she goes back to the guy and sticks it up his butt again and says" That wasn't chicken that was steak and just then he says"yes it was you ******. She says"Oh... I didn't know" He says" duh your a blonde" and she just stares with drool hanging out of her mouth and says" Really I didn't know... derrrrrrrrr!!

That was funny. Seriously. Funny like lung cancer.

do you think this topic should be pinned??

24 blondes and a brunette are on a plane when it starts to crash the pilot says they have to lose some wheight or they will crash so they start to take the plane apart.
they take out the walls but its not enough.
they take out the roof but its not enough.
in the end all thats left is a pole, the tail and the cockpit.
everyone is hanging on the pole with noting under them when the pilot says someone has to jump so the brunette offers to jump and all the blonds clap.

lol... that was pretty funny.

« Last edited by jackx on Nov 28th 2006 »

was that sarcasm.I want to be on the team mario. Sorry for double posting.

On 28-Nov-2006 cyber_john3000 said:

do you think this topic should be pinned??

Nah.
TI's joke was said before. How unoriginal.
I got one, what's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.
I have better jokes but someone will get offended.

Post them anyway. This thread is as funny as a funeral home, it needs brightening up.