Supercheats Fan Fiction and Role Play tournament

I'm currently working on it, why else wouldn't I be inactive for a while?
XD

I don't know why "You wouldn't be inactive for a while", seeing as that translates into "I'm currently working on it, why else would I be active for a while?" Yes, because normally you post a lot when your working on something that a ton of people are waiting for, right? In any case, we just want it posted. Oh, and by the way, thanks T_T You just made me explain this to about 4 people who don't get it. Good job. This also acts as a BUMP incase you decide to post the thing after like a month and 17 days.

« Last edited by King of Hell on Dec 1st 2007 »

X, I've had most of my match finished since before you said you were almost done like a couple weeks ago. And the part that I haven't finished is only because some of it may rely on what happens in your match. Get it in gear. :P

Due to the epic failure of Xtreme gamer's writing speed, he has been moved back to round 5 of this tournament, meaning that Seos san Nekros will instead be posting the next fight. Take it away Jaffa.

...oh, and bump!

Right. Notice: if there is anything even remotely wrong with this, it is X's fault. Because he took so long and then got his spot given to me, so I had to fill in gaps pretty quickly. And it's also probably pretty long, considering I had... like two months to second guess myself about how good it was. Surely anything is better than nothing, right?

Anyway...

Round 4

Rajha Stavanos vs Seth

Silence dominated the arena, the only noise being the occasional quiet gasp among a few members of the anxious audience. The lights had been dimmed and a fierce tension was penetrating the air. All eyes present were trained on two spirited competitors, watching them closely, noting their every twitch. The entire crowd held its breath in unison, and all was quiet...
?All, save for Xtreme Gamer, who desperately tried to break the silence with poor attempts at whistling. For he, and he alone, stood between the stern opponents. Seated on one side of him was Sotek, and on the other, Pandaemonium; they both glared across him at one another, locked in the world?s most intense staring contest. Neither of them had moved for the better part of eight minutes, much to the quiet astonishment of the crowd.
Xtreme Gamer leaned forward and waved his hand in between their stares and was promptly punched in the neck from both sides, so he fell back into his seat and resumed his whistling.
The crowd behind the judge?s table began to quietly part, no one daring to disturb the staring contest, as Cervantes De Leon pushed his way through, muttering ?pardon me? and ?coming through?. When he reached the barricade dividing the bleachers from the judges? table, he jumped over it and approached the judges.
?Would you believe I had to buy tickets to get back into my own tournament?? he mumbled, leaning against the table. ?And from a bloody scalper, no less!?
Nobody acknowledged him at all.
?What?s this about?? he muttered, noticing the fierce stares being exchanged.
Seos san Nekros wordlessly gestured to the match card.
Cervantes De Leon took one look at it and sighed. ?Oh.?
Rajha and Seth would be fighting next, so both Pandaemonium and Sotek had a vested interest in the outcome.
The corners of Pandaemonium?s lips twitched slightly, while Sotek remained perfectly straight-faced. Soon, Pandaemonium could hardly restrain his smirk. After another minute or so, he burst out in frantic laughter, leaning back into his chair and pounding on the judge?s table with his fists, cackling hysterically. When the laughter seemed like it was going to subside, he glanced back at Sotek and then threw his head back again, this time laughing so much that his chair tipped over and he fell out of it. Everyone exchanged puzzled glances.
?What is so funny?? Sotek demanded.
After taking several deep breaths ? and laughing some more ? Pandaemonium finally stood his chair up and pulled himself back into his seat at the judges? table. Fixing Sotek with a stare that was clearly hiding even more laughter; he said bluntly, ?Sorry, you just look so ******* ridiculous.?
Sotek?s face reddened. He had worn his hair in a ponytail.
?Oh, shut up, it?s not that bad?? he commented defensively.
Testvirus101 quietly pulled out a small mirror and slid it down the judges table, Pandaemonium still fighting to regain his composure.
?BAH!? Sotek shouted as soon as he had picked up the mirror and looked at his reflection. ?Fire! And lots of it!?
He sunk into his chair and undid the ponytail while a large number of audience members roared with laughter.
As the judges and audience regained themselves, Seos san Nekros glanced idly at his watch, and then his eyes widened. ?****,? he spat, ?gotta go!?
With that, he stood up, bounded over the table and sprinted off down a ramp into the backstage area.
?What was that about?? Pandaemonium asked, confused.
?He has to go write the match,? Cervantes De Leon shrugged, taking a seat in the abandoned chair, putting down popcorn and beer.
?I beg your pardon??
?He?s got to write the fight. Can?t happen without a writer, y?know.?
?Oh, great. I was wondering why this was taking so long. Jaffa likes to build too much suspense before action. We?ll probably have to sit here for an hour before the fight even starts. Bloody terrific.?
?You do realize that you?re contributing to the boring bit by talking, right??
Pandaemonium fell silent.
?? So he?s going to be writing the fight? while it?s happening?? Testvirus101 queried. All the judges were confused by this.
?Naturally,? Cervantes De Leon responded.
?So we?re going to be watching something at the same time as it is being planned??
?Basically.?
?Well what the feck happens if he makes a typo?? Pandaemonium demanded.
?Something explodes, probably. Why?? Cervantes De Leon muttered.
?Jaffa typos all the damn time!?
?? Perhaps I should have thought this through??
All conversations were cut off into silence as a lone warrior strolled calmly into the arena. He wore a black tunic which flowed in stark contrast with his pale-white skin, and his brown hair was untidy. He stood in one corner of the arena, idly swinging a black Morningstar, occasionally letting it scrape against the arena floor for effect. Many audience members cheered, others booed, and Sotek stood on the judges table, screaming his approval and clapping frantically. Seth ignored the audience completely.
Then the lights dimmed slightly, accentuating the holy glow that surrounded the next combatant. He sported a green undershirt, black pants, and brown leather gauntlets, in addition to a golden breastplate, which reflected his own radiant aura brilliantly. He twirled his sabres in practice swings as he took his place in the opposite corner from his opponent. Neither fighter spoke. They just glared at each other with intensity to match the staring contest from earlier.
The stadium began to quake as the new stage was chosen for the fight. The words ?Truesdale?s Prison? appeared on the overhead stadium monitor. After a few moments, the surrounding area seemed to disappear entirely. The arena floor, now cut off from the judges table and bleachers, was suspended in a vast void. The ring had been reduced to a trembling plateau of Earth that lingered in blackness as far as the eye could see. Even the skies were veiled in shadow. Only the stands and the arena floor remained, and even they were shaded. The only light came from a shimmering moon high above, its rays glinting through the thick darkness. The judges and audience strained their eyes to see in the limited light.

?3? 2? 1? FIGHT!?

Neither competitor wasted any motion; they both lunged at each other instantly. Seth swung his Morningstar with deceptive agility, but Rajha Stavanos managed to roll under the attack, slashing at his opponent?s legs with both of his sabres. Seth jumped into the air to avoid injury, and kicked Rajha in the back as he came down.
The warrior from Garlina staggered forward, but quickly caught his balance and spun around on the spot, knocking Seth away with a blow to the head from the golden hilts of his sabres. He tried to press the advantage, but Seth parried the attack and rolled away, kicking to his feet and facing his adversary.
?Please tell me you can do better,? Seth smirked, adopting a combat stance with his Morningstar held firmly in both hands.
Rajha did not reply, but simply charged forward, adeptly thrusting at Seth?s chest with his swords. Seth eluded both attacks by swinging his own weapon in front of him, knocking the blades away from him with the rapidly spinning chain. He followed up by swinging the weapon viciously at Rajha?s throat, but the Garlinian ducked under the attack and shoulder barged his opponent in the stomach, knocking him to the ground.
Suddenly, a bolt of electricity forked from the ground, followed by several smaller sparks. The fighters glanced around the area, sharing a mutual confusion, until the entire arena floor burst into electricity, the limitless elemental energy of Truesdale?s Prison electrocuting both warriors. They were both caught in the surge of electricity as it struck their nerves and thrashed them about violently.
It lasted for a few seconds and then vanished, leaving the disheveled warriors in temporary peace. But the interruption had infuriated the both of them, and they lashed forward with new vigor, each preparing to strike. Seth made the first move with a wild swing of his Morningstar. Rajha somersaulted under the blow at the last possible second, turning on the spot and driving his elbow into Seth?s spine. He swung both of his sabres at his opponent?s neck in a scissor motion designed to finish the match early. But he sliced through thin air as Seth dodged the attack and countered with a downward swing of his mace. Rajha sheltered himself behind his swords, which he crossed in front of him as a shield, but still staggered backward against the force of the attack. He flipped backward to avoid further offense, and then the warriors stood a few meters apart, facing each other with their preferred combat stances.
Rajha leapt back into battle, swinging one of his sabres horizontally. Seth angled his Morningstar to block the attack with its chain. Rajha quickly followed up with a thrust from his other blade, but Seth was one step ahead. With expert precision, he moved his own weapon between himself and his charging opponent. It was timed so well that Rajha?s blade slid into one of the chain links of the large Morningstar. With one strong and swift tug, Seth pried the sabre away from its wielder and let it fall from the chain to the arena floor.
?Bugger,? the Garlinian muttered, shifting his stance to hold his remaining weapon with both hands. ?You?ll pay for that.?
?Try me.?
But before either of them could move, the plateau of Earth on which they stood began to tremble violently. Streaks of fire erupted from the floor and etched their way in random directions across the battlefield. More lightning bolts forked from the ground and struck about wildly. As the elemental energy of Truesdale?s Prison took its toll, the combatants watched in stunned silence. In addition to the unpredictable pulses of energy, the plateau itself had begun to tilt on its axis. Seth was raised higher and Rajha lower as the platform shifted. The lost gold hilted sabre began to slide down toward its wielder as the incline grew steeper, and soon enough the Garlinian stooped to regain his weapon. While he was hunched over, Seth began to sprint down the slant, gaining momentum easily by letting gravity aid his progress. But Rajha noticed too soon.
?Supernova!?
He threw his arms out in front of him and sent a wave of light flying toward Seth, who narrowly rolled out of the way. The magical attack spiraled off into the void of nothingness, leading to a distant explosion after several seconds, which looked like nothing more than a white pin point in the darkness. Rajha parried a Morningstar swipe and responded with a swift kick to Seth?s jaw, knocking the young warrior onto his back. But the Garlinian stumbled too as the platform began to level itself back out.
Both were ready to jump back into combat in the blink of an eye.
?Who dares to disturb my rest??
The competitors hesitated as a shadow spread across the ground. Everyone in the arena ? audience and judges included ? craned their necks and looked up toward the moon, which was partially blacked out. Floating in between it and the arena floor was the shady figure of Viper Sevikar. He wore a stern look that showed he was not happy about his having been eliminated earlier. He floated idly, with his hands stretched in front of him. An array of light was gathering in his palms, and it looked from below as if he was gathering power directly from the moon over head.
?You have invaded my sanctuary. And for that, you will both die.?
He shouted something in a strange language and then the power of the moon flowed through him in the form of a tremendous orb of whiteness. It rocketed toward Rajha, who tried in vain to shield himself from the oncoming energy. But when it should have collided with him, it passed harmlessly through his body as if he wasn?t there, leaving no trace of damage, and then dissipated uselessly on contact with the arena floor.

?What the hell?? Pandaemonium asked from the judges? table, as all of his colleagues scratched their heads in confusion.
?I call shenanigans!? Cipher Wizard roared from somewhere in the audience.
Sotek and Seth seemed disappointed, and then everyone else stared on in mutual confusion. Even Rajha seemed bewildered by the fact that he still existed. Viper looked positively livid at the result.
?Ummm?? Testvirus101 muttered.
The loud speakers abruptly crackled from somewhere in the void, followed by the sound of someone clearing their throat. Seos san Nekros spoke soon after. ?Oops. My bad.?
?Idiot,? Pandaemonium growled, slapping his forehead. ?I told you he?d typo.?
In a bizarre spectacle, the image of the fight scene began to undo itself by happening again in reverse as Seos san Nekros erased his mistake. The hologram rewound until the moment before Viper fired the attack, and then resumed. The judges shrugged as the attack was launched again.
This time, Rajha ran a safe distance away. Viper Sevikar?s attack struck the ground and, this time, had its intended effect. It exploded on contact, sending debris flying in all directions, along with a shockwave that ravaged the plateau and knocked the combatants off their feet violently.
With an agonized roar, Viper was swallowed back into the void of his prison, and the fighters down below slowly returned to their feet. They glared at one another, each of them weary from the elemental energy that had ravaged their bodies, in addition to the interruption from Viper itself. Both of them looked like they were ready to pass out on the spot.
?It?s time I finish this,? Rajha said, breaking the deafening silence in the arena.
?Give it your best shot,? Seth sneered.
To Seth?s surprise, the Garlinian sheathed his sabres. He was again surrounded by an aura of holy light, but this time he channeled it directly into his arms, which were raised above his head.
?Infirit Lumino Mejura Firaja!?
A ring of white hot flames spiraled into existence around Seth and then abruptly closed in around him, threatening to burn him to death in a matter of instants.
Now it was Rajha?s turn to be surprised. Because all Seth did was smile, at first. Then, in the day?s next oddity, the ring of fire seemed to break. He was freed from its grip as the flames poured into the spiked end of his morningstar.
?For future reference,? he muttered, ?it probably isn?t in your best interest to try and burn a fire wielder.?
Before Rajha could blink, Seth spun around in his place and lashed out with his weapon, sending Rajha?s attack back at him with doubled intensity. Caught of guard, Rajha was met in the chest with his own attack and blasted off the shaky plateau of earth. Instantly, the hologram faded, and reality resumed, where the scene showed Rajha having collided with a wall outside of the arena, unconscious. Still on the arena floor, Seth grinned only momentarily before collapsing from exhaustion himself.

?BOOYAH!? Sotek howled, jumping out of his chair and performing a ridiculous dance. It was cut short by a sharp punch to the neck from an angry Pandaemonium. ?Worth it?? he added, falling over across the judges? table.
?Do you have like, a quota for how many people you have to injure today?? Testvirus101 asked.
?Yep. Thanks for helping me meet it.?
A particularly vicious neck punch leveled Testvirus101 as well, followed by another to Xtreme Gamer.
?Why?d you hit him?? Cervantes De Leon asked.
?? Why not?? Pandaemonium shrugged. Next fight, please.?
Cervantes De Leon nodded and got out of his chair, bounding toward the backstage area. Seos san Nekros returned from the writing booth and reclaimed his seat?
? Before being punched in the neck and knocked over.
?You and your typos,? Pandaemonium muttered. Finally, as medical staff gathered to attend to the wound of Rajha and Seth ? and most of the judges ? Pandaemonium leaned back in his chair and put his feet up on the table. ?Well? On with it!?

« Last edited by Seos san Nekros on Dec 9th 2007 »

Insanely good, and worth the wait 100%. Your a comedic genius, and a three person fight was perfectly portrayed. I have no more to say, due to the amount of awesomeness. And I agree with Pan. Next fight please!

And now we wait... again. For X. Sadly I haven't started mine. I guess I should start it? D=

Maybe, you'll prob get it done before X anyway.

On topic, epic fight Jaffa. Don't know why you were so worried bout the comedy, cause it was spot-on. Great length too.

« Last edited by Cervantes De Leon on Dec 9th 2007 »

Ah, great comedy is rare in this day and age. I guarantee that if someone sold it on Ebay it would be worth heaps.

In other words, this chapter was hilarious. I can always rely on this fic for a quick laugh. The fight was also well written, but, we all know its da comedy that does it.

Yay, Seth won! Great fight, though I've never heard of the arena before. Where is it?

I also have to agree that you managed to get the comedy perfect, especially the "typo" and the pre-battle staring contest.

Incidently, what were the votes like? And who's writing the next one if X is delayed again?

I'm not exactly sure about the arena. It was the one Cipher submitted for use. The prison crafted for Viper Sevikar.

As for the votes:

Rajha Stavanos: 0
Seth: 5

I was surprised. Cez voted for Seth because he said he wanted to avoid an all-Ferla final round. I think everyone else voted for Seth for the same reason, or just because they figured others would vote for Rajha. Either way, landslide for Seth.

« Last edited by Seos san Nekros on Dec 10th 2007 »

Out of curiosity, where is my match meant to be set?

To answer Sotek's question, this are the events that occur between the previous fight and X's fight. Yes, it is rather short, not being an official fight. And yes, Cervy did let me post this...

??? vs. ???

??? vs. ???

At the judge?s table, Sotek was having animated conversation with King of Hell. Testvirus was looking at them with a confused expression on his face. Pandaemonium entered, once again lugging a keg of beer. Upon seeing King of Hell, he promptly dropped the keg on his foot, promptly saying ?For Christ?s sake?? before launching into a long tirade of obscenities aimed at King of Hell, the keg, and all topics that ranged in between.
After recovering, he left the beer where it was and stormed up to TestVirus, and fumed ?May I ask what the bloody hell this is all about??
When Testvirus was unable to provide an answer after much shrugging and gaping like a fish, Pandaemonium punched him in the neck, and looked around for Jaffa. Unable to locate him, he looked for Xtreme Gamer.
Both were not present. Resigning himself to the fact that King of Hell would have to judge the match, he punched him in the neck, cutting him off mid-sentence, and sat down with a depressed sigh. King of Hell rubbed the back of his neck swearing under his breath. Sotek smiled sympathetically and suddenly stiffened and sat down at his seat.
King of Hell looked at him questioningly, only to feel another sharp pain in the back of his neck.
Turning around to see Pandaemonium motioning for him to sit, he sat down at Seos?s seat, observing the arena. Seeing Xtreme Gamer striding into the arena, all the judges said ?Aww hell no? in perfect unison, repeating the phrase once again upon seeing Seos walk in from the opposite end. Xtreme Gamer was walking towards the judges table, expecting to take his seat.
Seos san Nekros, however was there for a different purpose. "X, you're a wrestler and an athlete and stuff, right? So you must be fairly strong... correct? If so, do me a favor and punch yourself in the face? called Seos. Xtreme turned around, rather confused. King of Hell drove the palm of his hand into his face repeatedly, contemplating the stupidity of the situation. Panda, having gotten over the shock of King of Hell being a judge, another bear related injury, and the prospect of a fight between Xtreme Gamer and Seos san Nekros, took out a note pad and several pens, and passed a sheet and writing utensil to each judge.
Each judge wrote the name of the contestant they wished to see victorious. Cez quickly consulted a small handbook, and twisted a knob on the judges table. A small screen shot up in the middle of the table, from which he read ?The Cerberus?, as the arena shifted and warped into the top of an elite space cruiser.

3?2?1?Fight!

Seos san Nekros wasted no time or energy, sprinting across the metal hull of the ship, and drove his knee into Xtreme Gamer?s stomach, forcing him to double over, before jumping back and kicking him in the face. After recoiling, Xtreme Gamer somehow produced a plastic Scythe, and proceeded to slash repeatedly at Jaffa with it, not realizing that it was doing next to nothing.
Catching the scythe by the blade invoked a cry of ?I shall reap you!? from Xtreme Gamer, which was promptly followed by him getting clouted with the handle of his own Scythe. King of Hell and Sotek had already cracked open the pizza that was reserved for the first match of round 5, greedily helping themselves to the multi-topping work of art. Cez, meanwhile cracked open the keg, and was drinking like a fish. Xtreme decided that the time for acting like a personification of death had passed, and simply swung his fist into Jaffa?s jaw. Rolling with the punch, Jaffa was on his feet in an instant, and grabbed Xtreme by the legs, spinning him around and hurling him into a wall of the ship. Xtreme hit the wall hard, and thudded onto the ground, barely conscious.
Getting up and shaking himself, he cleared his blurred vision in time to see a very angry Jaffa charging at him. He rolled out of the way, although, unfortunately, out of the way led him off the ship, and he fell with a sickening crunch onto the arena floor, which was, for some unspeakable reason, actually the arena floor. Sotek looked at King of Hell, King of Hell looked at TestVirus, and Testvirus looked at Pandaemonium, who looked at the screen and began yelling obscenities at the message displayed.
?Error: The connection has timed out. Please connect to the stage selector when a real fight is in progress.?
Seos mouthed ?What?s wrong?? to Sotek, who snickered, shrugged, and pointed to Panda. Seos shook his head, and charged Xtreme Gamer once again, knocking him off of his newly regained balance. Xtreme hit the floor with a thud. Alarm bells sounded, and a large metal door at the edge of the arena opened, revealing one very disheveled Cervantes de Leon, wearing a bathrobe, frothing toothpaste, and holding a cup of coffee.
Marching up to the judges table, he yawned and asked ?Has X decided to finally post his fight?? All the judges shook their heads. ?Then what?s this all about?? he asked, completely confused. King of Hell pointed to Seos, who, in response, held up two books. Clearly readable on the front cover were the words ?Irim Da Ravola? and ?Uega ren Vakir?.
?I got them both done and published before the bugger posted his fight? Seos explained. All the judges applauded Seos? literary success. Xtreme groaned from his position on the floor, and Cervy responded by kicking him in the face. All the judges held up their scrawled votes, each one saying ?Seos san Nekros?.
King of Hell got up. ?Well, that was rather enjoyable.? Turning to Cervy, he asked ?Can I be a judge of the next tournament?!?
Cervantes nodded briskly, and turned around to go back to sleep, but was stopped in his tracks by a terrifying roar of ?To hell he can!? and the sound of multiple necks being punched.


« Last edited by King of Hell on Dec 11th 2007 »

I thought the neck punch was applied to the front of the neck.

Not really comparable to the regular fights, but enjoyable nonetheless.
So, are you actually a judge now?

No, he's not. He will be in the tourney which will be made fter this one though. Also, that was worth reading for the simple reason that it was completely random.

And I don't think it matters where the neckpunch hits, so long as it's in the neck.

Cat: Thats because it wasn't a regular fight. It was expressing my frustration towards X for not posting... And I was bored. Glad you enjoyed it though.

Sotek: Replying to you this because everyhting you said was true.

« Last edited by King of Hell on Dec 12th 2007 »

Sorry if this is soooooo long. If you read my post in the discussion thread, you'll know exactly why it took me so long. Please don't hate me, everyone gets a stab at me one at a time. There's going to be some weird spacing, so hang with me.:P

Round 3 (Delayed)

Sion Lions vs Artemis Kramen

There was a lot of noise, the crowd rallied for the next fight.
"Come on dammit, what the hell is taking so long?" a man in the audience asked over the noisy crowd. He was then reaped by Xtreme gamer after his sentence, his soul plunging into the depths of hell as he screamed.
Meanwhile, Xtreme and Pandaemonium were playing a nice game of Tunk, Xtreme gamer tapping his bony finger nervously on the table, trying to decide whether to throw away his Jack, or keep it.
Pandaemonium cracked a devious smile.
"What's the matter slick? Jack feeling dull and wants to play?" he said, playing mind games.
Xtreme's knee started to bounce up and down nervously, the table making an irritating creaking noise. He extended his hand out, and then brought it back.
"Screw you, your goin down, and that cookies mine!" Xtreme said confidently, drawing a card. It was what he needed; he now had a trio of Jacks, an Ace, and an eight. With a toothy grin, Xtreme laid out his trio of Jacks on the table with a loud, thunderous smack, dropping his eight on the large pile of cards. Holding his Ace tightly, and ready to count three turns, Xtreme haughtily folded his arms, giving a hearty smile.
"Ha! Beat that!" he challenged.
Pandaemonium just shrugged. "Okay." he said, quickly laying a fourth Jack on Xtreme's trio of Jacks, picking up the eight, laying down a trio of eights, and dropping his last card for the win.
"Oops, I think I just kicked your **** again." he said, Lulzing as he slowly ate the cookie, torturing Xtreme.
Xtreme laid his head down in defeat, Cervantes De Leon coming up from behind.
"Wow dude, that's 293,826,812,789.52 to 0." he said sadly, marking a 100 foot tall chalkboard with another tally. ?Don?t worry, you?ll get him next time.? He assured, patting him on the back.
"Oh yeah, remember the other end of our deal Xtreme?" Pandaemonium reminded, mashing the half-bitten cookie into the ground.
The entire Supercheats staff came rushing in, standing over Xtreme.
"You've got to buy us all a treat!" everyone said in harmony.
Xtreme moaned and groaned, for he knew he was going to be in depth for another century.
"Ouch, hope your pockets are as fat as swine." Seos San Nekros said, patting him on the back. "After all, you?re buying gourmet correct?" he asked devilishly, pulling out a long list of items that just kept rolling across the ground, reaching the ends of universe. "Then I'll have all of this, Pooly will have this, Cataclysm will have these, Sotek will have that, Testvirus101 would like this one boiled, the others fried and..." Seos San Nekros went on and on for seven days and nights. Morning came, a rooster lazily strolling up the tournament building?s peak.
"****-a-doodle...f*** this!" the rooster said obnoxiously, packing his bags, putting on his brown travel hat and leaving, only to be vaporized by Pooly's Mod Lazar.
"Mm...Just like how I make it on Cooking Mama: only for Wii." Pooly said happily, taking a nice, big, unhealthy bite of rooster.
"Kill me, I beg of you!" Xtreme gamer pleaded, dropping to his knees, praying for Pooly to vaporize him.
"Um dude, Death can't be killed by Death." r & c mega said, appearing from nowhere.
"You want a treat? I?ll you all a treat! Yeah that?s right!" Xtreme said insanely, laughing evilly, running through a brick wall.
Testvirus101 sighed heavily, shaking his head. ?Does he know that there was a door right there?" he asked, pointing at the door.

"While Xtreme goes off and buys everyone here treats, let's get this baby poppin!" a random announcer said, trying to get everyone rallied up.
The crowd roared. Finally, they were going to see some action.
"From the Zirion Planetary System, weighing in at 246 lbs, the beastly elemental warrior that everyone knows and loves: Sion Lions!" the announcer screamed as the crowd roared, the spotlight shining on the west side of the arena.
The place went up in ablaze of multi-colored fireworks, a large, steel ramp rising from the ground. Music of epic proportion was playing loudly as Sion came running out like a ****** coming out of Toys R Us. Sion did wild, animal-like gestures, beating his chest like a frenzied animal as the crowd roared. For some odd reason, he had a golden-plated spinner belt, which he held high up into the air proudly: it was the WWE Title, which he had undoubtedly mugged from one John Cena.
"Oh yeah babay whooooo! The real champ is here!" Sion shouted obnoxiously, spinning the center plate as he walked into the arena. He gave a toothy grin, throwing his championship belt into the air one more time as the crowd roared again. "Even though I went completely broke preparing that performance, I'd say it turned out rather well." Sion said with a sigh of relief.
Testvirus101 leaned closer to Pandaemonium.
"A barrel of beer that this guy gets smoked within an hour of the fight." he wispered to Pandaemonium.
"Your on, barrel of beer that he gets aced within an hour of the fight." he replied.
Cataclysm came from nowhere, startling both Panda and Test. "There aint no such thing as illegal gambling without me around...especially if it involves substances that are bad for you, count me in! SION LIONS FOR THE WIN!!!!!!" he shouted loudly.
Pooly soon interrupted. "Wow, his entrance was so focking cool! Almost as bright and colorful as Super Mario Galaxy...only for Wii." he stated, nodding several times.

The announcer was feeling it, throwing his microphone in the air. It dropped onto the ground with a loud thud, the speakers making a loud screeching noise.
"Fail." Cervantes De Leon, Pandaemonium, and Sotek said in harmony.
"Ahem...er..sorry about that, my first time. Anyways, hailing from the Spirit World, weighing in at 197 lbs, The ruthless and cold king of the Spirit Realm...Artemis Kramen!" the announcer shouted as the crowd roared.
Artemis appeared in the ring in a loud flash of jet-black electricity, scaring the crowd and announcer alike. His power struck fear in the hearts
of many, men hiding behind the women, children crying, and Pooly under the judge table, holding into his Wii for dear life.
"He just wants my Wii! That's it..he wants my Wii! Never!" Pooly sheirked insanely, locking himself in a dark room.
"We meet again Lions. This time, on the battlefield." Artemis said gruffly, his unholy power so mighty, the very air around them began to grow foul and tainted.
"Like wise Kramen." Sion responded sharply, a multi-colorful aura surrounding his body. "I can't even put a label on the power your emitting, I can't even count that high." he said in all serious-ness, giving a small grin. "Come to think of it, you can't even count by fractions, excuse me." he insulted.
"Still the incompetent fool I see." he replied, a surge of jet-black electricity striking the ground in front of Sion. "It will be a pleasure in stuffing your mouth with my blade." he said, summoning his five-foot black blade known as Elecktron, his black aura overpowering Sion's.
Sion's multi-colored aura intensified, combating Artemis's raw power in equilibrium, his Lionara Gauntlets and Greaves appearing in righteous glory.
"Sorry pal, but I just don't quite swing that way if you know what I'm sayin'." he grinned, getting into battle stance.
"I won't. Dead men don't speak...they wail." Artemis retorted.
The announcer staggered back in fear, he knew this fight was going to be intense. He had a large, smelly brown stain on the back of his slacks.

3..2..1...FIGHT!!!!!!!

Artemis slammed Elecktron into the ground, it's black blade giving off powerful electrical currents. "Electronica Diablobicous!" Artemis roared, jet-black bolts of electricity jutting out of the ground, and towards Sion.
"Woah!" Sion shreiked in terror, barely dodging them. "That all you got?"
Artemis smiled. "Look down." he warned, pointing down.
Sion looked down, over 100,000 bolts of jet-black electricity jutting up from beneath him, creating an intimidating, demonic light show. The crowd was screaming, bolts of lightning shooting everywhere.
"Damn! He got his az smoked!" Testvirus101 laughed, watching the electricity run wild across the area.
"He so got aced!" Pandaemonium said, clapping it up, enjoying the tons of flickering lights.
Testvirus101 shook his head in disagreement. "He got fried, so I win the bet."
Pandaemonium shook his head in disagreement. "No you babbling moron, he got aced, so I win the bet."
"Fried." Testvirus101 said, getting up out of his seat.
"Aced." Pandaemonium said, pulling out an pistol.
"Fried!" Testvirus101 replied, pulling out an shotgun.
"Aced!" Pandaemonium yelled angrily, pulling out an M4 equipped with laser sighting.
"Fried..." Testvirus101 yelled back, pulling out an heat-seeking rocket launcher.
"Aced..." Pandaemonium stomped, pulling out an RPG rocket launcher.
"Put the toys down kiddies, observe." Seos San Nekros said, pointing at the ring.

Electronica Diablobicous sub-sided, the sight of Sion on one knee, his body giving off smoke. Jet-Black electricity pulsated around him as he struggled to get to his feet. Artemis looked at him with wide eyes. "Impressive. Not only were you able to absorb that much punishment, but you were able to escape three-fourths of the damage intended," he stated, taking Elecktron out of the ground. "When did you learn to use the elements in such a way?" he asked in a curious tone, adopting a battle stance.
Sion cracked a smile, shrugging off the extreme shock treatment. "That was quite shocking I would say," he snickered, his multi-colorful aura returning. "It's going to take more than that to put me down for the dirt nap." he stated firmly, summoning Enyuu, Broadsword of Fire and Earth.
Artemis twirled his blade around. "Want to swordplay? I can clearly see your intent!" he said as he lunged forth in blinding speed, swinging his blade down on Sion.
Sion parried the strike with an upper guard, fending him off with a shove of his flaming orange blade. He swung Enyuu horizontally, only to be evaded. Artemis and Sion went blow for blow, black electricity and fire could be seen after every impact of their hungry weapons. The crowd was going 'oh' and 'ah' as their mystic steel clashed.
Artemis thrusted the hilt of his weapon straight into Sion's jaw, his left hand giving off a unholy energy at the same time. "Avaska Laiza!" he shouted, a sphere of dark energy shooting out of his hand.
Sion tried to dodge, but was hit square in the chest with the sphere of dark energy. The sphere engulfed his body, imploding into a dark explosion a few moments later. His body was spinning like a drill towards the ground, hitting the ground with a loud thud, Enyuu disappearing on contact. "Oh!" the crowd said in harmony. Sion sat up, gripping his chest.
"Ouch, that really hurted!" he said in pain, kicking back up to his feet.
Artemis simply got back on stance. "Your sword fighting skills are quite sloppy with that blade, is it too heavy for you?" he taunted.
Sion answered with a martial arts stance. "Okay buddy, let me show you where I thrive in battle...Arashi!" he said hastily, disappearing in a motion blur.
Artemis tried to keep up with Sion's quick movements, swinging his blade in random places. Sion gave Artemis a wet willy. Sion laughed as he literally ran circles around Artemis. This made Artemis furious.
"When I catch you, your dead!" he yelled in anger.
Sion finally revealed himself with an hard uppercut to the gut, his Lionara packed with all four elementals. Artemis staggered back in pain, only to be struck in the ribs this time by a haymaker to the ribs.
"Get Some, Get Some, Get Some, Get Some!" Sion repeated over and over as his strikes connected, lighting Artemis's body up with speedy, high-impact, and mind-boggling blows from all directions. Sion finally launched Artemis into the air with a high-heel kick to his chin, Sion jumping up into the air like a speeding bullet.
"Feel this!" Sion said, punching Artemis in the face. Sion let loose a flurry of brutal strikes onto Artemis's pressure points, Artemis unable to defend himself; he was in too much pain. After his hellish combos, Sion hesitated, his body was processing so much power, he couldn't quite get a hold of himself. In just a few seconds, he was able to shrug it off, executing an elementally charged polish-hammer onto Artemis's forehead, sending him on a collision course for the ground. Sion started to rotate slowly in mid-air horizontally, eventually, his was spinning rapidly. Fire, Earth, Wind, Lightning, and Water elementals encasing him as he spun towards the ground. Artemis hit the ground first with a thunderous boom, Sion coming down on him with a momentous, spinning side heel-kick on his chest.
"Lionara Combo!" he shouted fiercely, Artemis calling out in excruciating pain. Sion did a barrel roll to his feet, breathing heavily, due to the mass amount of stress his body was going through. "That's what I'd like to call an instant kill quick." he said, dusting his hands off as the crowd roared with excitement, chanting his name.
The announcer looked on with amazement. "And the winner is-" he was cut short by a sudden gag, his eyes glowing red. "Artemis Kramen." he said demonic-like. His voice was that of Artemis's, the crowd and Sion alike looking at him with widened eyes.
"How'd you...what the..you can...?" Sion stuttered, unable to comprehend how Artemis could escape such a beat down.
Artemis had possessed the announcer; his body was a vessel for his vile spirit. "Surprised? They don't call me the King of Spirits for nothing," he said haughtily, giving a small, sick laugh. "If there's anyone with a power lower than mine in a 10 meter radius, I can jump straight out of my body and straight into theirs for about 30 minutes or so." he explained.
Sion dropped to one knee, his entire body cramping up after using so much power. "...When did you leave your body?"
Artemis smiled. "Before you smacked me down to the ground. While you were trying to shrug off the stress that technique was putting on you, I simply left the body, taking over the fool you see before you." Artemis explained. "Now, I must be returning to my body, the end begins." he said before leaving the announcer's body, the announcer dropping unconscious.
Artemis's banged up body floated up high into the sky, and started to undergo metamorphosis. The sky blackened, and the arena shook, black lightning rolling in the sky. Darkness began to rise, eclipsing the sun. Artemis's body was engulfed in a cloud of pure darkness, a cry of power filling the air as the entire area was covered in a dense, black fog. Sion looked on helplessly, still hurting from his last tactic. Everything died down, an unholy array of light shooting down from above, Artemis descending down from the demonic heavens. He was in a armor-like suit that could only be defined by one word; Chaos.

As he landed on the ground, everyone looked on in fearsome awe, Sion included. Artemis gave a small chuckle as he took a small step towards Sion.
"Welcome to Hell, Sion Lions. Allow me to give you the free tour!" he shouted in an outburst of power, his body going through another quick change. Out of nowhere, there were four tentacles that emerge from his spine; three spikes akin to horns that emerged from his ribcage seconds later. Artemis lunged forth like a howling demon, shoving his heavy black gauntlet straight into Sion's gut, then elbowing him straight into his thoracic vertebrae. Artemis finished his combo by catching Sion's leg with a tentacle, brutally slamming him to the ground several times before tossing him several yards across the ring, near the edge of the ring. Sion coughed up blood as he struggled to sit up, so much pain going through his body, his stomach was literally numb. Artemis laughed in triumph. "I could tear you in two right now, but where's the fun in that?" he said, laughing again. Sion slowly extended his left arm out as he got to his feet, static starting to pulsate.
"Hm, what's this?" he asked, looking on. "Using your life's energy to muster up enough strength, yes? This must really be your last stand. Very well...come!" he challenged, adopting an defensive stance.
Sion abruptly gave a small chuckle, his eyes going primal.
"You must really be delusional if you think this is my last stand. You look a little thirsty!" he said fiercely, his adrenaline starting to pump as his left gauntlet started to crackle with frenzied blue lightning. He dashed forth, his multi-colored aura following behind him. "Thunder Crash!" he called, throwing his left hand forward with all his might, rolling thunder and lightning shining brightly as it came mere inches away from making contact.
"Your off guard! Ha!" Artemis said, thrusting his fist outwards, dark energy bursting outwards. Sion wasn't there, evading Artemis's tormenting fist, using Hydros to splash water in his face. Artemis looked around alarmed, on guard. "Where are you?" he yelled in anger, looking around. Sion was moving like the wind, water being left everywhere as he moved around the ring. Sion stopped moving, leaving a trace of water everywhere he went. Artemis laughed.
"Idiot! Your carrying raw electrical power with you as you throw water all over the place?" he asked.
Sion smiled. "Look around you, look at yourself, look at me, then say I'm F-ed." he said with a guile grin.
Artemis was all wet in a puddle of water. He was in the middle of a smiley face of water, Sion left with just enough safe distance to watch the soon-to-be show.
"Thunder Crash!" Sion shouted, slamming his hand onto the ground. Lightning was racing all around the ring in all directions, Artemis right in the middle of it all. Being so wet, Artemis was defenseless, the shock filling the ring as Sion dropped to one knee.

The crowd roared as the smoke cleared, the ring battered and scarred. But there was something wrong...Artemis was still standing. Everyone looked on, Sion's eyes widening. "No!" he said in surprise, slamming his fist on the ground. Artemis stood tall, unaffected by the guaranteed K.O. He walked towards Sion slowly, summoning a jewel-encrusted dagger with a gilded hilt, which measured at nine inches in length; just enough to pierce a vital. "This armor is made from the purest form of electricity, similar to Raizan's." he explained, spinning his dagger around. Sion was breathing heavily, his vision growing blurry with each passing second. "Your attempt was quite witty. Perhaps a bit too witty for you." he said, taking another step forward. "You put up a valiant effort against me Lions. I feel as though you could've done more, but you have a limit." he stated, gripping his dagger tightly, he was just a few feet away from his target. "You misunderstood your own power, and you've fallen." he said, standing over Sion. Sion was ready to black out, but threw a desperate punch to Artemis. Artemis caught his hand with one tentacle, and slammed his face into the ground with another. "But theres something about you that I just can't figure out..." Artemis said rather slowly, grabbing Sion by the neck with a tentacle, holding him up high in the air. "What gives you strength? What drives you?" he asked curiously, holding the dagger close to his heart. "Only an incompetent fool could misunderstand his own power...but, only the truly skilled could've pulled off such orthodox tactics." Artemis noted, recalling the smiley face made of water, and the Lionara Combo. "You've no mortal morals, you say what you want, but you've of great honor and virtue. Your reckless, yet you know what your doing. Your incompetent, yet skilled. A man of your character bewilders even me." Artemis said, glaring at Sion expectingly.
Sion struggled to laugh, his life was on the edge. He gave a final toothy grin, everything was silent.
"You can never be too moral. You'll cheat yourself out of life. Me? I aim above morality. I don't have to be good at all; but I have be good for something." he stated firmly. "I live the way I want. You and I are very much alike Artemis. I get my strength from pure endeavor, it's what I've constructed my life from." Sion announced proudly. "You wouldn't know, your not good for anything. King of Spirits? Sike, King of B*tches more like-"
Artemis brought Sion close to him with a violent jerk stabbing him in the heart. "Your life has ended, so it doesn't matter anymore." Artemis said coldly, dropping him to the ground.
Artemis walked off, dispelling his dagger about to step out of the ring. Sion's body was suddenly wrapped in an fiery golden-brown aura, Artemis turning around swiftly.
"What? I struck him in a vital, but he still lives?" Artemis asked, summoning Elecktron, and another weapon named Zapdron. Zapdron was shorter than Elecktron, but resembled it in every way.
Sion gave a small laugh, but it was different; it sounded like a beast. "A Senitelian heart isn't on the left side of the chest; it's on the right." he said slowly, violently shaking. A bright light blinding everyone as he roared. After the light sub-sided, it was the sight of a multi-colored, glowing figure standing where Sion once stood. As the glow subsided, Sion's hair was extremely sharp, like that of the mane of the Lion. He had very dark, thunder-bolt shaped tribal signs going down his eyes, more focusing around the eye area. He had rather dark lines appearing to be whiskers on his cheek, and primal golden brown eyes that represented the ferocity of a true beast. His face was still like before, but with a mean mug to it. His muscles were a bit more pumped than that of before. He had fangs, and a tail that swiped across the floor. He summoned Raizan, Twin Sword of Lightning in answer to Artemis's Elecktron and Zapdron combo.

Vegeta and Nappa came out of nowhere.
"Vegeta, check his power level." Nappa requested.
"Okay, let's see..." he said, pressing the button on his scouter, checking Sion's power level. Vegeta's eyes widened.
"Well? What is it?" he asked.
"It's over Wun Thowzand!" Vegeta yelled, smashing his scouter.
"Well, that's not all that bad." Nappa replied to Vegeta's anger.
"No wonder your not in the future episodes..." Vegeta sighed.

"Last stand, you and me." Sion challenged, twirling his blades around.
Artemis stood expectingly, walking towards Sion, his power pumped to the max. "This must be the power you were talking about. Obtained through endeavor eh? Fine, let it be the end!" he said.
Both fighters charged at each with everything they had. Both of them exchanging blade strikes blow for blow. There was an electrical field that surrounded the area, discharge of jet-black electricity and golden electricity pouring out of the arena every time their blades clashed. There was also blood flying about, both of them cutting each other with powerful strokes. It was an high-impact, intense battle, Simon and Artemis roaring as they struck each other at the same time. It was a stand-off on who would fall first. Sion dropped to one knee, blood splattering on the ground. "Artemis..." Sion called, holding his side.
"Final words?" he asked, standing straight up.
"You dropped your pocket." Sion smiled, dispelling his Raizan, and returning to normal form.
Artemis looked down, his face was split. He was cut over 60 times. Not only physically, but spiritually, Sion's blades cut to Artemis's spirit also.
"No!!!!" Artemis yelled as his being melted away, completely eradicated.

The crowd roared and cheered, Sion giving a thumbs up as he walked out of the ring. "You damn right that's my name!" Sion said as he staggered like a drunk to the locker room, his clothing torn and ripped in all places. He was all bloodied up, battered and scarred. His buttocks could be seen in the back of his pants, and everyone started laughing.
Pandaemonium flipped the judge table over, Testvirus101 shot someone, and Cataclysm was enjoying his awarded barrel of illegally obtained substances, he had won the bet.
"Alls well that ends well I always say." Cataclysm said in victory, drinking his winnar liquor. The announcer from Mortal Kombat came out of nowhere.
"Flawless Victory!" he added.
Pooly came out of the dark room. "Is the bad man gone? It's okay sweetie, no one shall have you." Pooly said insanely, petting his Wii.
King of Hell raised an eyebrow. "Really, you two need to get a room."
Pooly locked himself in the dark room yet again, this time for personal reasons. "Oh my..don't tell me he's..." King of Hell said.
"Wii is cool and all, but he didn't have to take it so seriously." Cervantes De Leon added.
There was a loud and obnoxious noise, Xtreme gamer riding in a giant harvester. "I'm back peoplez!" Xtreme shouted, sounding the horn on the harvester filled with crap..literal crap.
"Chocolate Pies for all you bastards!" Xtreme laughed insanely, a cannon shooting chocolate pies at the Supercheats Staff.
"Oh sh*t! Hit the deck!" King of Hell said, getting under a woman's dress.
"Sh*t is right!" Testvirus101 said, opening an umbrella.
"I'm tired of this sh*t!" Cervantes De Leon shouted, running into the locker room.
"I was just bull sh*tting with X, I didn't think he'd take it to this extent!" Pandaemonium said, dodging crap.
"Holy sh*t! Grab the booze! Make haste!" Cataclysm yelled.
"You know, I'm feeling really sh*tty right now..." Seos San Nekros said, covered in it.
Xtreme ran over a few people, going completely crazy. It seemed as though Xtreme was going to win for once, he had complete control. Shao Kahn came to the rescue with his hammer, destroying the harvester.
"Gee, thanks a lot Shao Kahn!" the Supercheats Staff said in harmony.
"Everybody gets one." Shao Kahn said before leaving.
Xtreme got up, looking at everyone. "Sorry, just got a little carried away-"
He was knocked to the ground, everyone stomping Xtreme into the ground. He was being shot, stabbed, abused, sexually abused, harassed in every way possible, slaved, vaporized, and getting a series of neck-punches from Pandaemonium.
"You took too god damn long, and you bring us this crap?" Pandaemonium said, punching him several times.
Xtreme got beaten down worse than Rodney King.
"Seriously, we've lost all faith in you, it's gonna take a century to atone for your sins." Seos San Nekros said, dropping his morning star.
"But some good did come out of this..." Xtreme said in pain, trying to turn over.
"What?" King of Hell asked, ready to pound him again.
"I just saved money on my car insurance by switching to Geiko." he stated.
The beating went on for weeks, Xtreme never forgiven for what he had done.

END

All length of chapter taking is forgiven, for giving me a cameo and making this perhaps the longest fight here.

Pure awesomizm! The fight was well written and the comedy was spot on, just like these chapters should be. I'm surprised you haven't written an actual fic yet.

Yay, it's finally here! Great fight X, and worth waiting for. I spotted a few typos, although nothing too bad, but I would just like to point out that it couldn't have been a flawless victory due to Sion getting mauled for part of the fight. Also...

""Fail." Cervantes De Leon, Pandaemonium, and Sotek said in harmony."

That made me laugh for the simple reason that it would probably happen.

What were the votes like? I realise that I always ask this, but I like to see how close the contest was. Also, if the next fight is mine, then it probably won't be posted until January, as I'm going away for the holidays.

Everyone voted for Sion except for Pandaemonium and Testvirus101.